Bernadette来到聚会告诉大家她博士毕业了，而且得到了一份制药厂的巨额薪水的工作。大家恭喜Howard要开始吃软饭。Bernadette还给Howard买了块劳力士的表，令他十分不安，感觉像被包养了。

Leonard和Priya在屋里制造噪音，摘了耳机的Raj实在听不下去，想去投奔Howard，Howard要出去约会，跟他老妈相处又毛骨悚然，只好来找Sheldon。干脆就住Leonard的卧室，还被Sheldon要求签约。第二天Leonard回来发现他在，两人干脆决定调换住处，Sheldon也趁机验了Raj的血，拟了一份临时室友协议给他签。

Raj做室友可真是尽心尽力，光是晚餐布置就很花心思，令Sheldon意识到Leonard以前是多么敷衍。Penny顺便也来蹭饭喝酒，酒后向Raj吐露自己后悔与Leonard分手。

Priya父母和她视频时提起Priya要回印度，Leonard激动地跳出来揭穿了恋情，Priya也气坏了走开了。Leonard只好回来睡沙发。

Raj和Penny第二天醒来在同一张床上，正慌乱地往外走，发现大家都在，Penny满脸窘地挥手走人……

You want to split that with me? 你想和我分着吃一份吗

Priya准备点了和Leonard分吃

Can we move on? 能接着点菜吗

被嘲笑的Leonard希望换话题

It wouldn't help. The human body is capable of being flatulent for hours after death. 没用的 人体能在死亡数小时内一直制造气体

Sheldon紧追不放

What's up? 怎么了

Howard开门后问

Whose fault is that? 那能怪谁呢

Howard老妈说就他不是博士

Can I stay here tonight?  我今晚能睡你这儿吗

Raj想投宿

I guess that's okay. 我猜应该没事吧

Raj以为可以

I fail to see the difference. 我看不出什么差别

Sheldon觉得Amy的研究和Bernadette的差不多

I'll  make it simple for you. 我就这么跟你说吧

Amy开始解释

Is there something wrong with your neck? 你的脖子不舒服吗

Amy问

Have you considered massage? 你考虑过做个按摩吗

Amy建议

Don't flatter yourself. 别自吹自擂了

Amy指出

There's someone at my door. 有人在敲门

Sheldon说

Can I sleep here tonight? 我能在这里过夜吗

Raj请求借宿

I can see how that would be upsetting. Come in. 的确很令人心烦 进来吧

Sheldon同意

Don't bother. 不用了

Raj准备去

What are you doing here? 你在这干嘛呢

Leonard大惊

She doesn't get along with Sheldon. 她和Sheldon合不来

Leonard解释

It's still no reason for me to have to listen to you arm your photon torpedoes every night. 但那也不足以说服我每天晚上听着你在那装备光子鱼雷

Raj说

Okay, deal. 好的 就这么定了

Raj同意

I'd follow up with your regular physician. 我会跟你医生保持联系

Sheldon对Raj说他血糖有点高

As your friend, let's hope it doesn't come to that. 作为朋友 希望事不至此

Sheldon说希望不至于帮他终结生命

You get to pull the plug on him, too. 你也可以终结他的

Leonard告诉Raj

Well, that seems fair. 好吧 这样挺公平

Raj高兴地签了

Which Leonard was too cool to wear. 他居然觉得这胸牌配不上他

Sheldon还给Raj发lapel pin

Also, you're tasked with bringing home all takeout dinners. 还有 所有的外卖都由你负责帮我带

Sheldon对Raj说

No backsies. 不许反悔哦

Leonard说

Remarkable. I'm just realizing how much Leonard's been skating by all these years. 太了不起了 我这才意识到 Leonard这么多年一直多么敷衍

Raj准备了烛光晚餐 Sheldon惊叹

What's with the fancy spread? 这豪华的摆盘是怎么回事

Penny问

That came out wrong. 那是口误

Raj不小心说错了

All right, let me try this again. 好吧 这么问吧

Penny问

I mean, it's not like either one of us have heart disease. 反正我们俩都没有心脏病

Bernadette说

I've had way too much already. 我已经高了

Penny说喝多了

Hit me. 再给我满上

Penny又喝

Explain something to me. 请教一下

Penny问Raj

Can we not talk about this anymore? 咱们就此打住行吗

Raj不想议论了

You totally got that right! 你居然完全懂啊

Raj称赞

Would you booze hounds please stop that infernal clinking? 你们俩酒鬼能别发出那种讨人厌的碰杯声吗

Sheldon在屋里喊道

We've been through this. It's not the time. 我们讨论过了 现在还不是时候

Priya说还不能介绍给父母

When were you going to tell me about this? 你打算什么时候告诉我这事

Leonard惊讶地得知Priya下个月要回印度

What a pleasant surprise! 真是个意外的惊喜啊

Priya装作刚看到他

You know what? I don't want to deal with this right now. 那啥 我现在不想讨论这个问题

Priya决定走开

What do you have to say for yourself? 现在你有什么好说的

Priya老爸凶凶地问

What are you doing here? 你在这儿干嘛

Sheldon质疑

I have paperwork that says differently. 我的文件可不是这么说的

Sheldon表示

Rajesh and I have a good thing going and you're not going to ruin it. Raj和我相处得很融洽 你不能就这么毁掉它

Sheldon声明

What's going on? 这是怎么回事

Leonard奇怪