一个爱英语爱画画的俄罗斯英文老师，为了方便学生记忆，自己不但变身插画师，还变身段子手，将枯燥的英文编成妙趣横生的文字游戏。这些本来作为课后读物的乱写乱画，因其独特风趣的幽默，竟然在互联网上广泛流传，大家一起来轻松一下吧～
一个爱英语爱画画的俄罗斯英文老师，为了方便学生记忆，自己不但变身插画师，还变身段子手，将枯燥的英文编成妙趣横生的文字游戏。这些本来作为课后读物的乱写乱画，因其独特风趣的幽默，竟然在互联网上广泛流传，大家一起来轻松一下吧～
手帐·英语·读书
1
Top 4 wishes:
To earn money without working.
To be smart without studying.
To love without being hurt.
To eat without getting fat.
四个最想实现的愿望：
不劳而获;
不学无术;
相爱无伤;
狂吃不胖。
2
Whatever you do always give 100%!
Unless you're donating blood.
做事情就要做到百分之百!
除非你是在献血。。。
3
This is Sahara toilet, the biggest toilet in the world.
这是撒哈拉大厕所，世界上最大的厕所噢～
4
Probably the worst thing about being a penguin is after you're in an argument you'll try to waddle away angrily but still look adorably cute.
身为企鹅最可悲的一点也许是，
一场激烈的争吵后，
你迈着坚毅的步伐愤然离开，
而在别人眼中却是一个摇摇摆摆卖萌的小可爱。
5
I just feel so irrelephant...
我就是觉得自己风马牛不象及。。。
【梗】单词发音相似双关梗
elephant
[ˈɛləfənt] n.大象
irrelevant
[ɪˈrɛləvənt] adj.不相干的;
relevant
[ˈrɛləvənt] adj.相关联的;
6
Old people at weddings always poke me and say "You're next."
So, I started doing the same thing to them at funeral.
老人们喜欢在婚礼上戳戳我，并对我说：“下一个就是你啦。”
所以我开始在葬礼上以牙还牙。
7
Of course I am in shape!
Round is a shape.
我当然很有型！
胖也是一种形嘛。
8
Strength is the ability to break chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands and eat just one of those pieces.
真正的勇士，就是可以徒手将巧克力掰成四瓣，却只吃其中一块。
9
Afraid to die alone?
Become a bus driver.
害怕一个人孤单地死去?
公交车司机是你的不二选择。
10
I’m not getting older.
I’m just becoming a classic.
我不是一天天变老，
只是越变越经典。
11
The moon can’t be a Jedi knight because of its dark side.
月亮无法成为一名绝地武士是因为它的阴暗面。
12
Can deaf people tell a difference between a yawn and a scream?
聋人能分辨出哈欠和尖叫的区别吗?
13
I think the guy who invented ties was trying to commit suicide. Then he saw himself in the mirror and thought... “What, this look nice.”-Steve Stifler
我认为发明领带的人其实打算自杀，然后他在镜子里看见了自己的样子，于是想到“等一下，这个看起来不错。”——史蒂夫·斯蒂夫勒
14
Cats through the ages.
时间恒久远，猫咪永流传。
15
Are you crying?
No, I’m having an allergic reaction.
To what?
To life.
你在哭吗?
没有，我只是过敏了。
对什么过敏?
人生。
16
Tell someone they can do anything and they won’t know what to do.
Tell someone what they can’t do and they’ll know exactly what they want to.
Humans...
对他们说，他们可以做任何事，
他们会不知道自己该做什么。
告诉他们，他们不能做什么事，
他们马上就知道自己想要做什么了。
唉，人啊……
17
I fail to understand the “good” part of “good morning”.
我就不明白了，“早上好”到底好在哪里。
18
I don’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
哥努力攀到食物链的顶端，
可不是为了吃素的。
19
If I had 24 hours to live...
Ah, fuck it. I’d probably just sit and eat chicken from a bucket.
如果生命只剩下最后24小时，
管他呢!
我只想一边坐着一边不停地吃全家桶!
About the authur
作者简介
LingvistovLingvistov creates illustrated stories about everyday life as we know it: importance of delicious food, appeal of a good afternoon nap and our justified obsession with cats. Motto - make people laugh!
手帐·英语·读书
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